Windows to the Soul

Ok, everyone knows that windows are not an area to try to skimp, particularly if you want an Energy Star certification. We did the right thing and bought the best windows we could afford. What most of you don't know is the loathing I had for this decision. That has nothing to do with windows.

When I left accounting and first ventured into sales, I held a job for 30 days as a rep for a replacement window company. I truly believe this is as close to outright fraudulent activity that I've ever come. In my defense, there was a deep recession and professional positions were hard to come by. I had no sales experience, so I was also greatly disadvantaged competing for one anyway. Thank God office automation came along and afforded me this career.

Most consider me a mild mannered person, but I'm intensely competitive. I absolutely hate to fail or lose. I was 0 for.. as a windows salesperson. They started sending more experienced con men with me to teach me how to lie and cheat the customer into buying their product. I refused to adopt their 'techniques', but I did finally make a sale. A nice young couple seemed to like my demo and sales pitch. After I did my dog and pony show, we sat at their dining room table, which was thankfully a nice, solid piece of furniture. I wrote up the quote and presented it to them. They balked at the price as every customer before them had done. I had no negotiating skills or understanding of sales, so I was overwhelmingly frustrated at seeing yet another sale slip away. I lost my temper, slammed both fists on the table and said loudly in a belligerent tone, "Do you want to dicker?" The husband replied in a very quiet and meek voice, "no". I said, "Alright then" and slid the contract in front of him, which he promptly signed. My "trainer" was smiling in the background. Afterwards, he told me what a great technique that was, but he didn't think he could pull it off because he didn't have the physical size I had. I turned in my window kit a couple of days later and walked away with a PROFOUND distaste for that business and frankly, my own conduct.

So, to all windows salespeople in the world, we bought nice windows. Don't call us. We'll call you.