HBz Coalition

Ellen called me while I was in a business meeting today. She rarely calls during the day, so I interrupted the meeting to take it. She opened with, "Where is the dip net you brought back from your mother's?" Really irritated at the interruption for something like that, I crossly said, "What are you talking about?" She explained that a bird had found its way through a partially open door and was flying around. It was believed to be a finch. She wanted the dip net as a tool of capture. After my own hummingbird battle, she immediately had my attention and I desperately tried to remember where I had stored it, but could not. The look of concern on my face caused my coworker and customer to stop talking and listen in. Then, I erupted in laughter. It was one of those prolonged, truly enjoyable laughs that don't come your way all that often. You see, Ellen was a victim of the same defense tactic used by that tiny hummingbird on me. The 'believed to be a finch' intruder dropped its load right on Ellen's forehead, just above the left eye. The consistency of tactic leads me to believe that the local hummingbirds and their new shock troopers have formed a coalition to enforce manifest destiny on our home. They want to turn it into an uber bird house development. The HBz are the leaders though, since their accuracy is so much better than the 'believed to be a finch.' Like the HBz, we also have reinforcements coming. My mother is moving in early next month. Wait until they see what an 80 year old, fanatically neat woman does to something that evacuates itself in HER living space. They have no idea what's in store for them if they continue this conflict. I briefly considered asking Obama to negotiate with them on our behalf, but I think he'd only apologize for our building the home where we did, and then force us to give up square footage by locking us into a cohabitation agreement. He'd be very well liked by our opponent. We'd be miserable. No, the Mom response is the way to go.